“Let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.” Khalil Gibran
What does a sucky friend look like? A person who talks down about other people. A person that talks down about themselves. Don’t try to fix that it’s an endless pit. A person that lies. How can you trust them?
In order to have a flourishing relationship of any kind it is important to be like minded. In spirit, life, similar interest, emotional intelligence. A friend should be present for you and nudge you to shine. Bringing out the best in one another. A friend does not out-story tell, or compare, a friend is there for laughter and never judges tears.
What once was a lovely friendship, may no longer fit. Life changes and friends can change with it.
Walking away from a long-standing friendship can be daunting. A painful task you may not want to face. However, you feel drained and annoyed when you spend time together. Making lame excuses to put off seeing them. The commonalities you once had are dated, a loop of history that is worn. What was once cute is now tired.
I won’t lie, female friends can be brutal. Jealousy is the worst when a long-standing friend compares herself with you, you’re in a world of trouble. No one will come out of that ok.
I have had friends support my endeavors with publishing my first book. I have had others, well disregard and turn their nose up at me. My friend did not want to celebrate in my hard work. That was the beginning of the end of ‘us’.
Another friend hated that I found a solid man. Standing at my doorway I asked her to stop putting him down. That I would figure out on my own, if he was worthy of my time or not. I found out, I married him.
If a friend repeats mistakes and revels in the mess, I back away from them. Life is too short for drummed up drama.
Divorce is more than just for marriages it can be with friends as well. If you can step away in love then your friend can forge their own path. Making certain that you let them know you are heading in a different direction and you will always be grateful for your time together. Knowing you were a fit at one point but no longer are.
My Mantra: “Counting my friendships on one hand keeps them real”