“Inspiration is a fickle lover willing to betray you. Only you can keep your dreams alive; they are yours and yours alone.” Katie L Lindley
Inspiration can hit you like a flock of birds unwelcome, but there it is. Like a gift handed down from heaven, not knowing what to do with it?
That happened to me, an unwelcome inspiration to write a children’s book. Within a three-minute song, I had a book downloaded into me; I cursed the heavens, “I’m not a writer.” Then I wrote it down raw and real; after all, the story was all there. All I had to do was follow orders.
I published my first book about love, dating, heartache, and finding myself through my relationships. I had moments where I wanted to stop. Why bother? Who cares? What is my motivation?
That being said, I want to quit; I want to stop and just paint, garden, ride horses, and sulk. There are times that I feel like I am not going forward even though I am trying. Maybe I am not trying hard enough? Self-doubt creeps in, and that in and of itself can flatten me; I sink down lower than the last time. Do I give up that part of my soul, my dreams?
Then one person shows up and tells me I wrote the book for her, about her, now she can read and understand what she had been through was not so different. That is why I write for the one person that needs my words.
I am blessed that a sliver of hope showed up, when it doesn’t, I remind myself of these three things.
- What is the motivating factor to keep me moving forward? Money, fame, fear of success, fear of failure, embarrassment? None of those reasons factor in; with me, as altruistic as it may sound, I want a voice so others do not feel alone as I did for years as a single and dating. Trust me; you are not alone; dating and love are tricky. I want to reach that one person who needs my story.
What is standing in the way of your calling? I have wanted to hide for years, hid behind my words. Now I am in front of the camera, and I must come out of my shell. It is awkward and uncomfortable, but I let my dreams die would be more tragic.
My Mantra: “Make a plan and check off one thing a day.”