“Whatever your opinion on it, ‘Sex and The City’ was undeniably a show that told stories where the main focus was on women and not on men.” Miriam Shor

I am overly ecstatic that Sex and The City is returning! Long-awaited and, I am sure, without a doubt, a smart show about the characters we have all grown to love.

Sex and the City, one of the first shows centered around women’s sexuality, single lives, searching for love. Spawned two feature films in 2008 and 2010. The series returns for a revival on HBO Max, adding another chapter for us to see. Parker, Nixon, and Davis all reprise their characters from the original, but Samantha, Kim Cantrell (the sex-centered one) will not return.

As a writer and a single girl for decades, “Sex and The City” was my hidden inspiration. My guilt-free binge-watching go-to. Taking notes that their friendships lasted and outweighed many relationships with men.

An ongoing search for that one true love. Many common denominators with men spread throughout all of the women. Even the character Samantha ended up preferring emotionally unavailable men and a whole lot of sex. Unlike many gals I know, that character was not looking for love.

The magic of the big screen adds an unrealistic element of extravagance; a columnist could never afford the high-end lifestyle as represented in Carrie Bradshaw’s character. Thankfully we do not watch escape shows to see the gritty reality; we want to be swept away with all the frills. You would never see stained torn underwear on the floor, nor would we want to; note to self: (clean out your underwear drawer).

Carrie was not afraid to love and lose. She tried many different dating scenarios throughout the life of the show. We saw her in love, in tears, engaged, in an affair, and leaning on her girlfriends when she needed to. She is a bit of ‘the girl next door, very thin and fashionable, yet still possessed the qualities of an approachable person. We all cheered her on as she went from love to love, and even in her singlehood, she made life look okay.

As a writer and single myself, I paid acute attention. I made a record of my own journey in search of love and the result, my book, “A Man for Every Purpose, My Naked Journey Searching for Love”. A witty exposed read about dating, love, and the loss thereof, cheeky yet is ultimately wise. Thanks to Sex and The City, I felt fearless sharing my stories. What I represented is much closer to flip-flops and further away from Malono Blahnik’s, that is okay too.

Carrie Bradshaw and I found out a couple of things, guess what? It is okay to be single and searching. It is acceptable to be dating; it is wonderful to be in love. It is fine to leave the man that is not right. By the way, never settle. Having strong friendships is family. It is just right to remain single if that is what you want, go, women!

Basically, we can learn from our girlfriends. They have stories and tears that our hearts can connect to. Wisdom does not always have to be our own experience; we can learn from others.

Wide-eyed, broad-shouldered, it is important to embrace what our friends go through. We are all coming from a different set of shoes, not all fancy, yet our love lives may not be so far from one another.

Many moments of being single, I felt empowered. Going through my ‘Carrie Bradshaw’ phase where I dated a lot, and unashamedly.  I channeled a little ‘Carrie,’ and that was just right for me at that time. I could laugh at myself and some of the dating antics I found myself in. I wrote about it, much like Carrie did on the show. Sex and The City and all the women inspire me then; no doubt will continue to do so.

My Mantra: “Life imitating art, for me birthed art, my book!”

 

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Katie L Lindley

Although I would like to say I am organized, focused and cookie-cutter, that simply would not be me. I am no different than any other woman in the world. I love to love, love hard, and, in the end, have learned to love myself above all else. So here I am, writing about the many men and the multiple purposes they have served in my life. Realizing that not one man on my roster had fulfilled every single one of my needs. Perhaps one man is not supposed to? I have compiled snippets of the men that have entered my world. In the end, they have shoved me towards my bathroom mirror, forcing me to take a better look at myself. Reflection is brilliant and the strongest guidepost into ourselves.

Working on the next book in the series “A House for Every Purpose, My Journey From Pillow to Pillow” revels a woman abandoning her home in search or her identity beyond men, motherhood, author.

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