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Often, women as little girls are sent off on a track for them to live a perfect life and be a perfect woman. Not for boys, who can be themselves with their mood and their temper.

Claire Denis

The age old misogynistic meaning of the female bitch. I am not writing about the male counterpart. I’m just wanting to reflect on myself or women and moments rightful or not, to “bitch”.

For the most part I feel that sugar and sweetness will get you a great deal further in life. Trying to live my day to day with kindness towards all that I come across. I see my temper or kindness waver when I am tired or hungry or fighting off a flu bug.

I was with my guy on a beautiful Maui vacation with rainbows in the sky and mia tia’s in our hands. Not a care in the world but to breathe in the salt air from the pounding surf.  I found myself small and turning on the guy I love the most. This is not at all fair to him but it was real nonetheless.

Unfortunately, I managed to go “bitch” on my guy because my list of feeling tired sick and hungry were at a high. I apologized right away, that helped, but I realized how easy it was to just snap at him. I felt awful, I didn’t feel pretty or loveable. Those feelings had a way of rolling around in my head increasing negativity, staring in a counterproductive role.

I had also noted that when I get bitchy some men just tune themselves out completely. As if they had an innate switch to just not hear one more word. Especially when it has crabby demanding tone attached to it. I’ve witnessed men go from being present to being off on another planet. The planet of peace that tunes out every word said. I didn’t have a passport to this planet so I had to quickly change things up.

In a man’s world where women are in the trenches being a bitch is not only required but expected. Being a fine bitch is a woman that is in control of her emotions and can express herself well mannered, and precise. Us girls may have moments that require a formidable worthy contender and being forthright is demanded. This is a role woman must step into. Today’s world where women can be anything they want.

Perhaps one day the misogynistic meaning behind the word bitch will fade away and team work between the sexes will reign. There are great strengths that men and women possess. The humanity of the sexes may not be so different after all. We are not from other planets. We are just in the time and society that we are.

I will try not to bitch at my guy, ever. I will bring out my in control bitch if and when I must on my journey to succeed. There is a time and place for boxing gloves. I’ll just make sure they match my outfit.

My Mantra: “I can feel badly without turning on those close to me”