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Sex is a bad thing because it rumples the clothes.

Jackie Kennedy


I shut down to men who are liars, mean, rude to others, disrespectful. This kind of behavior will get no bedroom romper time with me no way. It is simple, be nice equals getting the goods. I feel sexy when I am treated well. Is that what romance is all about? Wining and dining to get the naked outcome, it seems like a well-established system to me. Dating it can be stressful or a blast. There seems to be great importance on dating as many couples set aside date night to try to keep the sparks alive. Even well into a marriage, light a candle, buy some fresh flowers, pop open the wine.

When my daughter was to be married I gave her husband-to-be advice. I told him “try to have sex everyday, even if it’s just a quick hello”. Sex can bond people in a profound and loving way. I continued and explained “sex starts in the kitchen”. He looked confused and at this point I am sure he thought I was going to be a pretty cool mother-in-law. How you treat each other will reflect your sex life. It is a simple law of love. Kiss her in the kitchen, or make her dinner. Small acts of kindness may reap just what you want. Listen to her if she has had a bad day, at least half listen then show up with Chinese take out, remember her favorite dish. That will win her heart.

I have found that many women link their heart and their vagina. Some of us gals are silly creatures that have been made to be soft and sensitive. We can be the nurturing side of the equation, and this girly role suites me just fine.

To that becoming naked and opening our hearts may lead us to opening our legs. Be nice, show kindness, spoil us, and open the door, all things that lead to great lovemaking. Vaginal access open… to the man a gal feels safe and happy with. Throw down make up sex after a horrid fight, may in fact create big fun yet can form an unhealthy sexual routine; loving-kindness may create a healthier happier sex life. I am not sure?…it’s all sex guesswork.

My Mantra: “My sexuality is a gift I have the power to make choices that make me happy and safe”