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“I believe in large families: every woman should have at least three husbands.” Zsa Zsa Gabor
We celebrate birthdays, holidays, christening, weddings, marriage, bar mitzvah, baptism. All good reasons to come together. We gather for funerals to honor someone’s life, another good reason to gather.
Divorce often times is hard, awkward, gut wrenching, difficult to understand, and to process. If divorce is celebrated it may take a long time to send out those invitations.
Divorce for me transformed when I woke up and understood where I was culpable. I became softer and awakened, I let go of blame, regret, and anger. Releasing judgment, I started to heal and shape myself other than a wife. Oh damn, that made me a divorcée.
All divorces are not failures some have just moved on or took a different path, grown apart. Some divorces part with great love and respect acknowledging the good parts. Often times friends will divide to one camp or the other, I have seen that done and the other party left empty handed in respect to their once friend group.
What if the divorce couple that had moved past the obvious pain and threw a party of sorts? What would that celebration look like?
It might be for one of the ex’s or both. It could be as heartfelt as friends can support this change as they supported their lives in many other ways. Perhaps if we can rethink people’s decisions for their life we will drop judgments and expectations and find love and acceptance in what will look different. Maybe we don’t have to choose camps maybe life, love and friendships will continue. Things can look different and be okay.
I am blessed most of my ex’s I am friends with or my friendship with them lasted long beyond the marriage or dating. Whatever the case may be we did love and one point. Loves are different and life presents changes that can affect your journey in relationships. It is not always cut and dry.
Two people tried, two people became one, two people may become two once again. It is hard to be on the outside looking in at what seems very sad. Then again everyone’s relationship is theirs and theirs alone. No one gets a vote. If we love our friends we offer shoulder support and if appropriate a celebration. If we are to celebrate change perhaps divorce should be on the list?
Crazy concept or brilliant?
Love and life changes let’s accept change with as much grace as possible. Life lessons are at every intersection.
My Mantra: “I am blessed to support my friends through all of life’s changes”