DEAR SANTA, ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS THE RIGHT MAN!?!

“The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.” George Carlin

There are no good men out there! I hear this over and over; I call bullshit.

Those gals are attracting the wrong men by making a few crucial mistakes. I am not saying it is simple; I am saying change is possible.

If what you are doing is not working, stop; it’s not working!

If you are sincere about finding a partner and are willing to try something new, here is your list for Santa. We all know how to order online, so this is how you put together your order for the right man….

STEP ONE:

Pen and paper. Write down what you want in a man. Don’t be shy about details that seem silly. If they are essential to you, list them. Do you want a man who is kind, successful, optimistic, spiritual, sexy, yogi, playful, athletic, healthy, and funny? List what you deem as your perfect guy.

Now. Be all the things you want to have in a man. Kind, fun, innovative, successful (don’t look at me), it was your list, BE YOUR LIST. Intentionally practice what you want to have in a partner.

STEP TWO:

Pen and paper. Write down your never-evers. This list is mega important. It is what you want to avoid at all costs. You have painfully learned in your love history what not to repeat. Hellish stories you have heard from your girlfriends. You will not go down the road with a rude guy, a mean guy, a guy who hates his mom, one who is down on his luck with no future vision, or someone bitter towards his ex. You get the drift that this is a no-way guy. Dedicate this list to memory because he can be oh so dreamy, cute, amazingly charming guy who is actually a ‘no-way-man’ right under the surface.

Then, you got it.

Hold to all the ‘no’ qualities you yourself will not have. You cannot expect a guy to be patient if you snap at the drop of a hat. You, too, must learn to be a patient person. You must become like if you want to attract like.

Remember the essence of a man. They are hunters and want to go after a good catch. If you are in his face and offer too much too soon, you could lose him before you have him.

Sitting back and letting him come to you is one of the most brilliant things I did in a relationship.
In a nutshell, I met a man, and we became friends. I knew we both were falling for one another. I just had to wait. I would not reach out, plan, call, or text. I just sat back and waited for him to initiate. We have been married for nearly seven years. I learned that lesson the hard way before him and would not pursue. When a man is highly competitive, he internally wants to win. Those successful, intelligent men must make the first, second, and third moves.

A man must cherish, respect, honor, and want to defend. If it all seems barbaric, I get that, but the nature of a man is just that; they are wired that way. Steve Harvey wrote a book, “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man.” His points are valid; he’s a man.

The delivery from Santa may very well be. Once you begin to practice what you want and never want in a man, you may realize that being single is the best thing ever.

This internal resolution will often manifest a man and mess up your well-earned, well-loved singlehood. Be careful; this manifestation thing is the real deal!

Combine the work and sitting on Santa Clauses lap; watch out. I hear the reindeer atop the roof!

My Mantra: “We attract how we feel about ourselves.”